You’re Living In a Fairy Tale — So Why Not Write Your Own Story?

heidi medina
6 min readFeb 1, 2019

EVERYTHING in your head is made up!

Yep, that’s right, all the reasons — stories — you tell yourself about why you shouldn’t ask for a raise, or why you shouldn’t quit your job so that you can freelance or why you shouldn’t take your dream trip — are all STORIES. You don’t have any idea of what the actual results will be until you take action and do the thing — until then it’s all a fucking fairy tale.

The little voice in your head, quietly tells you stories all day long, feeding you thoughts about whether you’re going to fail, succeed or finally do something better than the sister who’s “better” than you at everything. And many times, because you end up building this entire picture of how it’ll all be shit — in the end, you don’t even try — you give up before you even got started.

It’s all MADE UP. None of it is real. It’s only a fairy tale that your inner voice made up to “protect” you, and we ALL do it. But you can change it. After all, do you want to live your life defined by make-believe stories that keep you from living your dreams?

Why not flip the script and change those negative stories into positives? After all, they are made up stories anyway. So, why can’t you say “fuck it, they are MY fairy tales, so I’m going to make them the best damn stories ever, complete with happy endings?”

You CAN! Believe me — you CAN. Because it’s your inner voice and you CAN make it imagine anything you want. So, let’s get started.

Quick Start Action Steps

  1. Don’t shy away from your fears — look them head-on and embrace them. Fear helps you grow and change.
  2. Picture your goals and dreams — the win you’re seeking, then lack on and go for them.
  3. Get clear on your why — know what you want the happy ending you see.
  4. Don’t go it alone — get some help and support.
  5. Pay it forward — encourage others to find their fairy tale ending.

Embrace the Fear

Much of what our inner voice is telling us is nothing but fear — whether imagined or real — based on past experiences. Fear and pain are a genuine part of life. Heck without them, you wouldn’t know what the good stuff feels like or be motivated to grow and change. BUT you don’t have to let fear control you. Instead, embrace it— fucking OWN it.

Every hero in any fairy tale must overcome adversity in order to succeed and find a happy ending. And since you’re making up your stories, imagine the absolute worst possible end that can happen if you try something and fail.

Dig deep — feel the pain — the humiliation — the suffering — maybe even the death — IF you fail. Will people laugh at you? Will you end up homeless? Could you lose all your loved ones? Whatever the fear is, embrace it, feel into the emotions and feelings that come up.

Once you’ve felt the feelings and emotions that come up from your worst possible scenario, spend some time talking to your fear, loving it — reassuring it — thanking it. After all, it’s just your monkey brain working to protect you from further pain. And then flip the script!

Envision the Win

Now that we’ve embraced the worst possible scenario, it’s time to flip it around and envision the WIN. This is our story, we CAN see a different ending- we CAN have the fairy tale ending — in fact, we can see as many endings we can imagine.

Do you get rich? Do you find your soul mate? Do you become famous? Do people ask you for advice on how they can have what you have? Focus on those awesome feelings and emotions that go along with your win — the feel good and how you’ll celebrate and enjoy your success feelings and emotions. Isn’t it awesome?

All you have to do is believe you can have it, open yourself up to the possibilities and you can have it. It might not always come as you pictured it but if you focus on the ending, the “how” will work itself out.

So, stop letting your inner voice tell you about lousy shit stories and put it to work working up #GoodShit stories. You have the power and choice to have what you want in life, including how the stories in both your head and the real world go.

Explore Your Why

Part of flipping your story’s script to a happy ending means exploring your “WHY.” Why do you want that ending? Why not a different ending? What’s your motivation? Forget the how; understanding the “why” you want a dream or goal gives you purpose.

Maybe you want to pay off your debts or buy a new car for your mother or take a trip around the world. Or perhaps you want to make a positive change within yourself such as lose weight or lose a bad habit. It doesn’t matter what the “why” is, just that you have a “why.

And once you KNOW your “why,” believe in it with all your being and your fairy godmother — the Universe — will provide the how.

Believe in your why and your fairy godmother, the Universe, will provide the how. So be open to the possibilities because they may not always look the way you pictured them in your stories. But that’s the fantastic thing about stories; they can be rewritten as many times as you need.

Enlist Help

Don’t try to go it alone. You were never meant to be a lone wolf even in your fairy tales. Do you think amazing athletes, movie stars, Bill Gates, Elon Musk, Steve Jobs, or Sir Richard Branson made it to the top without help? Nope, they had plenty of support along the way to the top and still do. So, there’s absolutely no reason for you to go it alone.

Enlist the help and support of your friends, family, paid professionals, mentors, your boss, even strangers on the street into helping you achieve your fairy tale happy ending. The more people you tell and talk to about your dreams and goals, the better the chances of you succeeding because you are telling the Universe what you want. Telling others also helps you set yourself up for success because now you don’t want to fail and look stupid to them.

You can enlist help anywhere if you aren’t afraid to ask for it. I regularly engage people, even strangers, here in Portugal to help me learn Portuguese. I belong to Facebook and LinkedIn groups filled with people achieving the goals and dreams I have, and I talk to them, asking advice.

What’s the worst that can happen when you ask for help? They say NO? Who the fuck cares if they do! You are stronger with each rejection, and you keep asking until someone says YES and helps you.

Encourage Others

Don’t forget about the people around you. Someone might need your help and support to achieve their fairy tale ending. I truly believe the Universe rewards those who give back — keep the circle going by asking for helping and helping others.

When you’ve just begun flipping your script, you may not have as much time or energy to give to others. Don’t worry about it. Wait until you do. It’s okay to put the airplane mask on yourself first. BUT as you grow, learn, change and have energy reserves to share with others — DO IT.

Energy is a constant living thing, passing around, through, over and under — but never stopping. Do what you can to keep the energy flowing forward, encouraging and cheering others on in their successes — the power will always return to you, stronger than the time before.

Ending

This is your story — your fairy tale. You CAN write it any way you see it. Why? Because the stories in your head aren’t real, but you can make them into reality with your beliefs. Have a shitty belief system, and your life will be shit. But BELIEVE YOU CAN, and your happy ending will happen.

Need help writing your fairy tale, send me an email heidi@talktoheidi.com.

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heidi medina

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